For those of you who have traveled with Mary & I through my nonsensical musings, you may remember some of the past spots I’ve secretly arranged to celebrate our anniversary in some failed romantic way. On our 25^thanniversary and while on safari in Botswana, it was in the middle of a huge salt flat with absolutely nothing around us for as far as the eye could see (unbeknownst to me at the time I arranged it). Two years ago I had a small intimate table set up on a stretch of powdered-sugar fine sandy beach on the small island of Holbox, Mexico. While we dined on steak & lobster,  with romantic lighting provided by the stars above and Tiki-torches emitting heavy black toxic fumes wafting over our table, which was actually helpful as it helped to keep the toaster-oven sized mosquitos away.

Nautilus Restaurant, my surprise romantic spot this year, is on par with Georges at the Cove, or Island Prime, for those of you familiar with some of San Diego’s top spots, but with a twist – you dine in the open air under a thick rainforest canopy. To reach the restaurant, you walk up a very long, very poorly lit and steep dirt pathway – hopefully wearing Keen’s or Reef’s, not Ferragamo or Louboutin. What wasn’t mentioned anywhere on the website or by the locals who recommended it are the signs posted all over the dining area:

DON’T FEED THE BANDICOOTS!

On the menu and in smaller print it said something about not feeding the snakes, as well.

Now tell me, do I know how to show my wife a good time, or what? I’m truly amazed she still speaks to me after some of these well-meaning but poorly executed stunts. Despite the menagerie of free-range wildlife possibly roaming the dirt floored dining room, the food and service were excellent. Fortunately tonight there isn’t any fauna, just flora while we are there.

For those with a curious mind, the following information is provided to you courtesy of “Bandicoots-R-Us, For All Your Marsupial Needs” - Often confused with rodents, bandicoots are small, omnivorous marsupials. They are about the size of a rabbit, and have a pointy snout, humped back, thin tail and large hind feet. Males have a bifurcated penis.

Hmmm... TMI on that last bit of info? Yeah, I thought so too, but decided to leave it in anyway.